Crop Circles
Photographer: Kate Dockeray
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Recently, I was invited to a lovely new friend’s otherworldly 30th birthday party. She had rented a three-floor penthouse on the Upper East Side, invited an incredible array of people under a hilariously straightforward dress code: “fabulous' - come in feathers, sequins, makeup; anything where you'd think, ‘is she too much?’”
Halfway through the night, as we gathered to cut the cake and sing Happy Birthday, I saw her run-up to the second floor. What happened after was simply ethereal. On cue, a triumphant tune hit the speaker and she descended the stairs under cascading streamers that we popped on beat with her glittered step. She glowed as her disco ball-like dress reflected the chandelier’s gleam, creating reflections on the wall. I was struck by the cinema of it all, absolutely—but what struck me most was how she had created this moment for herself, this space. Like a crop circle aliens make when they touch down on Earth.
When Kate and I began talking about what we wanted to create together, we found ourselves discussing how our bodies have evolved throughout our lives. More specifically, we shared experiences of how others have responded to these evolving bodies and faces. We swapped stories of moments when our autonomies were unwittingly taken from us; when our appearances were uninvitingly scrutinized or applauded.
The concept of this photo series is inspired by comments, actions, and experiences that walk the line of being invasive. Moments that won’t make headlines, but will impact how we are on the street. How society pushes around and manipulates perceptions of beauty makes me want to shed my skin like an alien trying to fight its way out of its host. How am I supposed to act in a body that I want to shed? In reaction to all of these frustrations, Kate and I dreamed of a main character who was unabashedly herself and never dimmed herself at the expense of anyone; even as she navigates the mundane.
The photo series tells the story of an alien, or angel-like figure, experiencing her first day on Earth. From moving into her new apartment to winding down for the evening, our main character never dulls who she is nor sacrifices her glowing identity. Instead, we know this is someone who intends to make her mark and take up space, as represented in the first setup that shows a crop circle of dried flowers around her feet.
When we were styling our otherworldly angel, we chose reflective fabrics that we knew would react in a way that is reminiscent of galactic beams of light. Her hair floats around her like a halo; her makeup incorporates a dramatic eyeshadow look that reaches to her brow. This was intended to create the illusion of enlarged eyes, which is our nod to the quintessential image of a big-eyed green extraterrestrial.
Throughout the series, the main character never looks at the camera; at us. This places the viewer in the position of the voyeur. Our perspective of the subject is not of malice, but awed reverence as she glows to her fullest.
This photo series set out to answer the question: How am I supposed to act in a body that I want to shed?
Our main character exudes the energy that we all hope to have and sets out to answer this question. Her first day on Earth was dreamlike because she had no reason to think that she couldn’t glow as much as she was capable. She moves through the mundane with a sense of confidence and serenity that can only be achieved by someone who stands to believe that she shouldn’t have to dim any angelic part of her at any point.
Some say we are wrong or we exist on a different planet by making space for ourselves by fabulously adorning these skins we are given. Noted. They just don’t get an invite to our glamorous parties full of streamers, glitter, and chandeliers.
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Photography by: Kate Dockeray
Words by: Raquel Loving
Creative Directed by: Kate Dockeray and Raquel Loving
Model: Rachel Howard
Stylist: Haley Spaulding
Makeup / Hair: Christina Y. Kim
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"Plan B" purse by @hauntedollface